After an unwanted breakup, thinking about the rejection used some of the same brain areas as physical pain. It isn’t “all in your head”.
Source: Kross et al., 2011A SOFTER PLACE TO START AGAIN.
Less looking back. More coming home to you.
Heartbreak lights up the same craving circuits as addiction. That’s why it hurts this much, why you keep checking, and why it gets better with time and fewer reminders.
Free to build · About 2 minutes · Private · For adults 18+
SOUND FAMILIAR?
You’re not the only one who knows these moments.
Tap the ones that sound like you. Nothing is saved.
THE HONEST NUMBERS
No scare tactics. Just what the research says.
Actively looking at an ex’s social media predicted more distress that day and the next. One look can cost two days.
Source: Marshall, 2026In over a million posts, breakup language peaked the week of the split and drifted back near baseline around 6 months. A group average, not a deadline.
Source: Seraj, Blackburn & Pennebaker, 2021WHY IT’S HARD
Every check is a small dose. The plan stops the doses.
Your brain’s wanting system is still switched on and still looking for them. Each look at their page, each old photo, each “just checking” keeps it running.
So the plan is practical: fewer reminders, a place for the words you want to send, a script for the nights, and small steps back to a life that is yours.
WHAT CHANGES WITH NEWLEAVES
Every hard moment gets a plan.
The 1 a.m. urge to text
An unsent vault for the message, and a plan for the hour before
Checking their socials
A no-contact counter and a daily step that makes checking harder
“Who am I without them?”
Daily practices to rebuild routines, friendships and plans that are yours
START YOUR PLAN · QUESTION 1 OF ABOUT 20
What brought you here today?
Pick one and your plan starts building. There’s no wrong answer.
YOUR FIRST WEEK
Ten minutes a day. One small step each.
Here’s how your first seven days look. Your plan adapts to your answers.
- Day 1This hurts because it mattered: one rule by the charger
- Day 2Stop the doses: mute, archive, and move the photos
- Day 3A plan for the nights, when it is loudest
- Day 4Write the message, and put it in the unsent vault instead
- Day 5One friend who knows the plan, not the whole story again
- Day 6Eat, sleep, daylight: the body is part of the heartbreak
- Day 7A week of no contact: notice what got a little quieter
GOOD QUESTIONS
Before you
start.
There’s no deadline for feelings. Ninety days is long enough to stop the checking and build a life that’s bigger than their reply.
No. No trial shows silence makes someone come back. No contact is for you: checking and reaching out keep the hurt going.
Rowan, the optional AI companion, is there for the 2 a.m. minutes. It’s clearly an AI, not a person or a therapist, and it points you to real help when things are heavy.
Yes. Build your plan here in about two minutes, create an account, and start day 1 in your browser. Then sign in to the app with the same email and everything is there.
Building your plan is free. Full access starts with a free trial, and the price and renewal terms are shown clearly before you pay anything. Cancel anytime.
Your answers are saved to your own account and are never sent to advertisers. You choose whether to share anonymous analytics. Delete your account at any time.
No. NewLeaves is a self-guided daily companion, not therapy, medical treatment or an emergency service. Rowan is an optional AI companion, not a clinician.
NOT A PERFECT DAY. JUST DAY ONE.
Tonight you can miss them and still not text.
Build your plan on the web in about two minutes, then take it with you in the app.
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