After an unwanted breakup, thinking about the rejection used some of the same brain areas as physical pain. It isn’t “all in your head”.
Source: Kross et al., 2011FOR THE FIRST NIGHTS.
The first nights are the loudest.
You can’t eat, can’t sleep, can’t stop replaying it. That’s not you being dramatic: your body is part of the heartbreak too. Tonight, you don’t need to be over it. You just need a plan until morning.
Free to build · About 2 minutes · Private · For adults 18+
SOUND FAMILIAR?
You’re not the only one who knows these moments.
Tap the ones that sound like you. Nothing is saved.
THE HONEST NUMBERS
No scare tactics. Just what the research says.
In over a million posts, breakup language peaked the week of the split and drifted back near baseline around 6 months. A group average, not a deadline.
Source: Seraj, Blackburn & Pennebaker, 2021People still intensely in love were scanned an average of 63 days after being rejected, and their craving circuits still lit up. If it hurts at two months, you’re on a known path.
Source: Fisher et al., 2010WHY IT’S HARD
Right now, small is strong.
In the first weeks, big goals feel impossible. What helps is tiny and physical: one meal, water, daylight, sleep if it comes, and not sending the message tonight.
Your plan starts exactly there, then builds gently: a rule by the charger, a plan for the nights, one friend who knows, and a daily step back towards yourself.
WHAT CHANGES WITH NEWLEAVES
Every hard moment gets a plan.
Not knowing how to get through tonight
Day 1: one rule, one person, one meal. That’s the whole job
The urge to reach out
An unsent vault for everything you want to say
Nights that feel endless
A plan for your hardest hour, and Rowan for the 2 a.m. minutes
START YOUR PLAN · QUESTION 1 OF ABOUT 20
What brought you here today?
Pick one and your plan starts building. There’s no wrong answer.
YOUR FIRST WEEK
Ten minutes a day. One small step each.
Here’s how your first seven days look. Your plan adapts to your answers.
- Day 1This hurts because it mattered: one rule by the charger
- Day 2Stop the doses: mute, archive, and move the photos
- Day 3A plan for the nights, when it is loudest
- Day 4Write the message, and put it in the unsent vault instead
- Day 5One friend who knows the plan, not the whole story again
- Day 6Eat, sleep, daylight: the body is part of the heartbreak
- Day 7A week of no contact: notice what got a little quieter
GOOD QUESTIONS
Before you
start.
There’s no deadline for feelings. Ninety days is long enough to stop the checking and build a life that’s bigger than their reply.
No. No trial shows silence makes someone come back. No contact is for you: checking and reaching out keep the hurt going.
Rowan, the optional AI companion, is there for the 2 a.m. minutes. It’s clearly an AI, not a person or a therapist, and it points you to real help when things are heavy.
Yes. Build your plan here in about two minutes, create an account, and start day 1 in your browser. Then sign in to the app with the same email and everything is there.
Building your plan is free. Full access starts with a free trial, and the price and renewal terms are shown clearly before you pay anything. Cancel anytime.
Your answers are saved to your own account and are never sent to advertisers. You choose whether to share anonymous analytics. Delete your account at any time.
No. NewLeaves is a self-guided daily companion, not therapy, medical treatment or an emergency service. Rowan is an optional AI companion, not a clinician.
NOT A PERFECT DAY. JUST DAY ONE.
Get through tonight. Tomorrow we start day 2.
Build your plan on the web in about two minutes, then take it with you in the app.
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