Almost two-thirds of students had been in an on-again, off-again relationship, with more uncertainty and fewer positives.
Source: Dailey et al., 2009FOR THE CYCLE YOU KEEP GOING BACK TO.
This time it’s different, they said. Again.
The pull back is real, and so is the pattern. A reunion usually resumes the same relationship, including the part that hurt. Breaking the cycle takes a plan for the moment they reach out.
Free to build · About 2 minutes · Private · For adults 18+
SOUND FAMILIAR?
You’re not the only one who knows these moments.
Tap the ones that sound like you. Nothing is saved.
THE HONEST NUMBERS
No scare tactics. Just what the research says.
More rounds of getting back together went with more negatives and fewer positives. A reunion often resumes the same relationship, including the part that hurt.
Source: Dailey et al., 2009People who kept posting about the breakup for longer were doing worse a year later. Talking is fine. Living inside the story has a cost.
Source: Seraj, Blackburn & Pennebaker, 2021WHY IT’S HARD
The pull isn’t proof it’s right.
Intermittent closeness is one of the strongest hooks there is: unpredictable affection keeps the wanting system switched on long after the good times have stopped.
The plan prepares you for the moment it matters: a written answer for when they reach out, a list of what actually happened, and support for the days after you say no.
WHAT CHANGES WITH NEWLEAVES
Every hard moment gets a plan.
Their “I miss you” message
A reply you wrote on a calm day, ready for the moment
Rose-tinted memories
A private, honest record of how it really felt
Loneliness pulling you back
One-tap call or text to your people, and plans that fill the gap
START YOUR PLAN · QUESTION 1 OF ABOUT 20
What brought you here today?
Pick one and your plan starts building. There’s no wrong answer.
YOUR FIRST WEEK
Ten minutes a day. One small step each.
Here’s how your first seven days look. Your plan adapts to your answers.
- Day 1This hurts because it mattered: one rule by the charger
- Day 2Stop the doses: mute, archive, and move the photos
- Day 3A plan for the nights, when it is loudest
- Day 4Write the message, and put it in the unsent vault instead
- Day 5One friend who knows the plan, not the whole story again
- Day 6Eat, sleep, daylight: the body is part of the heartbreak
- Day 7A week of no contact: notice what got a little quieter
GOOD QUESTIONS
Before you
start.
There’s no deadline for feelings. Ninety days is long enough to stop the checking and build a life that’s bigger than their reply.
No. No trial shows silence makes someone come back. No contact is for you: checking and reaching out keep the hurt going.
Rowan, the optional AI companion, is there for the 2 a.m. minutes. It’s clearly an AI, not a person or a therapist, and it points you to real help when things are heavy.
Yes. Build your plan here in about two minutes, create an account, and start day 1 in your browser. Then sign in to the app with the same email and everything is there.
Building your plan is free. Full access starts with a free trial, and the price and renewal terms are shown clearly before you pay anything. Cancel anytime.
Your answers are saved to your own account and are never sent to advertisers. You choose whether to share anonymous analytics. Delete your account at any time.
No. NewLeaves is a self-guided daily companion, not therapy, medical treatment or an emergency service. Rowan is an optional AI companion, not a clinician.
NOT A PERFECT DAY. JUST DAY ONE.
Make this the last time you go back.
Build your plan on the web in about two minutes, then take it with you in the app.
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